Because good parenting advice is boooring.
Your future looks a hell of a lot brighter through beer goggles.
And there are very few opportunities in life to do something right, actually feel good about it, and get a nice buzz going at the same time.
Which is why it’s critical to bring a case of brew to your child’s back-to-school night. [Read more...]
That's not a purr. That's a cry for help.
It would be foolish of you to turn down these requests. You see, Samantha is growing, learning and adapting to the world around her, and that world often needs the fuel of uncooked sirloin.
Which brings us to Samantha’s alleged anger issues. [Read more...]
After the initial sting you'll start to get numb to the pain. Just like real life.
But this is like inserting a Lego in your puppy’s ass for soiling your carpet…which doesn’t work, as we’ve learned through, um, friends who have told us as much. (Seriously, we don’t even own Legos.)
Feeding your kid soap is a kinder, gentler form of punishment. It can be used for any number of transgressions (rudeness, poor grades, trying to stuff Legos up your puppy’s ass), yet we’ve found it works best when used in conjunction with a clean soul. [Read more...]
Rule #96: Allow Your Child to Touch Everything
Rule #95: Encourage Your Kids to Take Rides from Strangers
Rule #94: Give Your Child a Spray-On Summer Tan
Rule #93: Form a Rock Band With Your Teenager
Rule #92: Teach Your Kid How to Hitchhike
Rule #91: Rent an Old Geezer for the Holidays
Rule #90: Make Your Kids Share Their Birthday
Rule #89: Run Your Child’s Political Campaign at School
Rule #88: Nothing Is More Important Than High School Homecoming
Rule #87: Don’t Bother Photographing Your Kids
Talk.